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WAGd, PURR and WILD: Championship Series rooting interests based on players' pets

The baseball world now only revolves around four teams. Unless you are a fan of the Blue Jays, Cubs, Indians or Dodgers, you are just a passive bystander as the next champion is in the process of being decided. But that is no fun. There is a way to include everybody.

Unleash the players’ pets. 

Baseball measures a player's worth through wins above replacement (WAR), a sabermetric determining how much a player's overall presence and performance contributes to to his team's performance. But we are going to measure some players from the four remaining teams based on their love for their cats, dogs or animal-of-choice.

Dogs are rated by WAGd, 'Who's A Good doggie?', used to measure a pup's loyalty, cuteness, tendencies to occasionally or accidentally misbehave and impressions left on its owner(s)'s quality of life.

Cats are measured by PURR: Perfectly Utilized Rotation Rogue, symbolizing cats' general independent personalities and balance of disappearing, or going rogue, on its owner for unpredictable amounts of time and showing affection with its owner.

Miscellaneous animals are rated on the WILD: Whiskers Indicator of Lovable Demeanor. Because even if the animal might kill you, it's still pretty cute. 

Javier Baez and Kimbo, Chicago Cubs
Baez’s white and black-spotted pitbull nicknamed, Kimbo. Kimbo has swagger and is confident in his relationship with Javy, placing his paw on his owner’s foot for a photo. The most adorable sort — actually, the only adorable sort — of PDA. 

A photo posted by Javier Báez (@javy23baez) on Feb 11, 2016 at 6:46am PST

 

9.8 WADd. Seems like the type of dog who would not demand to go out at three in the morning because he wouldn't want to leave his peaceful cuddle session with Javy. 

Kris Bryant and Wrigley, Chicago Cubs
The Cubs’ third base phenom has rubbed elbows (or knees?) with the most prestigious pup in all of America: Bo Obama. Bryant and his fiancee, Jessica Delp, were among other Cubs at the White House in June. The Obamas’ Portuguese water dog, Sunny, also made a cameo. This definitely earns status points, but snapping a picture with a famous dog (or a cheetah) is never the same as the relationship between pet and owner. 

Luckily, the soon-to-be Bryants do have a pet, a black cat appropriately named Wrigley. Wrigley is not only a cat, but a black cat, so she has two stereotypes: that he or she is totally independent and that he or she is bad luck. Wrigley appears to be neither of those generalizations. Wrigley seems to enjoy being the only child and center of Kris and Jessica's universe. 

A photo posted by Kris Bryant (@kris_bryant17) on Sep 11, 2014 at 4:23pm PDT

 

Usually, cats can't be bothered with such petulant things like taking photos for Instagram, but Wrigley is right in the middle of all the action. 17 PURR. 

Anthony Rizzo, David Ross and an actual cub, Chicago Cubs
Goldilocks and the Three Bears except better, with real cubs and without Goldilocks. This photo speaks for itself. WILD animals, of course, are very difficult to grade based on their sporadic personalities and sometimes rude instincts. 

A photo posted by Anthony Rizzo (@arizz_44) on Mar 25, 2016 at 9:38am PDT

 

However, a baby WILD animal wins everybody's hearts. Especially when that baby WILD animal is a cub having a play date with the Chicago Cubs, his human family. Perfect WILD score: 30. 

Jorge Soler, Chicago Cubs
Over two years ago, Soler posted to Instagram a photo with his “baby”, a bulky tan-colored dog. In another photo, the same dog is wearing a Cubs hat with an expression on its face that can best be likened to what all Chicago Cubs fans looked like on Tuesday night when their boys in blue shocked the San Francisco Giants in the ninth inning to advance to the NLCS. A-plus in enthusiasm. 

A photo posted by Jorge Soler (@jorgesoler68) on Jun 28, 2014 at 10:31am PDT

 

11.1 WAGd.  This dog doesn't have time to chew on your favorite pair shoes or act out. Too busy putting on a Cubs hat and cheering for his or her best friend, or taking as many photos as his or her best friend wants. 

(Soler hasn’t posted any more recent photos of the dog, or any pet. So we are going to assume this is where his heart and loyalty still lay.) 

Willson Contreras, an adorable puppy, Chicago Cubs
Fall in love with the Cubs like Willson has fallen in love with dogs, and try to look this adorable while doing it. Operative word: try. This dog is spreading the good word, bringing once unbelievers into the dog community. Starting with Willson Contreras. This dog also might have just given a future puppy a home, without even knowing it, with Willson, Paying it forward, or pawing it forward. 

Falling in love with dogs

A photo posted by Don Ernesto (@willsoncontreras40) on May 27, 2016 at 11:35am PDT

 

I bet Contreras's performance skyrocketed on the day he met this dog. Intangibles are off the charts. WAGd score of 15.  

Francisco Lindor, Paco and Gina, Cleveland Indians
Lindor’s chocolate lab should be the mascot to Coldplay’s “Green Eyes.” Even if you don’t want to get behind the Indians and a banner championship year for the city of Cleveland, you can’t resist cheering for Lindor and his dedication to his pup. 

Paco has a sister, too. Her name is Gina. She seems to be a variation of a Yorkie terrier. Maybe a silky terrier. Gina is a mystery. She clearly doesn't need the spotlight to prove her love to Francisco, which is honorable. Lindor loves his dogs. They are his family. He is happier because they are around.

A photo posted by Francisco Lindor (@lindor12bc) on Oct 22, 2015 at 10:58am PDT

 

Paco also knows how to use his green eyes to get what he wants. Incredible self-awareness and ability to use his characteristics to their maximum potential for the betterment of everybody. Combined WAGd score of 35. 

Mike Napoli, giraffes, Cleveland Indians
There is no evidence that Napoli has a pet of his own, but overwhelming evidence that he absolutely loves giraffes. If it was legal, or practical to own a home with ceilings high enough, or possible live in a Harry Potter world where you get to pick which animal to take with you to Hogwarts, Napoli would have a pet giraffe. Last Halloween, he went as a giraffe. A year and a half ago, during his tenure in either Boston or Texas, he posted photos of giraffes to his Instagram with captions encouraging everybody to have a good day. Originality points to Napoli, for sure. If nothing else, we know what his spirit animal is.

 

We do have to dock points, though, because from what we can tell Napoli has never had an interaction with a real giraffe. Bucket list item for Mike, I'm sure. WILD score of 25. 

Jason Kipnis, comforting a kitty up for adoption, Cleveland Indians
Jason Kipnis furthering the cause that animals should be able to visit the ballpark every day. And yes, Jason, you are right: having pets in the dugout would be the best therapy. This kitten is clutch. This kitten's presence is immediately felt. Most notably, this kitten did the most important thing a player can do: prove that the team will be better with him or her around. Kipnis immediately knows that he would play better with this kitten in the clubhouse.

A photo posted by Jason Kipnis (@jasonkipnis22) on Jun 18, 2016 at 10:29am PDT

 

But we do have to take into account that we don't know much about this kitten's background, name or personality beyond this photo. (Yeah, I know, statistics are harsh.) 12 PURR. 


Jose Bautista, Willow, Toronto Blue Jays
Willow seems like the jealous type. A Stage 5 Clinger. But as long as the feeling is mutual, that’s admirable. Surely, Willow would come to Joey Bats’ defense if Rougned Odor ever starts up some funny business again. A French bulldog that requires lots of petting and probably begs for a lot of treats, but who could blame her? She should milk her lifestyle for all its worth and experience it fully. 

A photo posted by Jose Bautista (@joeybats19) on Jan 18, 2016 at 6:08pm PST

 

While Willow does seem demanding, she is also fiercely loyal and would never want to do anything to disappoint Bautista. 13 WAGd.

Kevin Pillar, Mick Jagger and Company, Toronto Blue Jays
It's unclear how many dogs the Pillar family has, but we know for sure that for two weeks in September 2015 Kevin Pillar had a pet teddy bear. We can also say with certainty that the Pillars have one English Bulldog named Mick Jagger

Focusing exclusively for now on the photo below: Pillar and his dog bond during morning yoga. This dog clearly knows how much Kevin values fitness and wants to support him in that. She seems to be a little camera-shy, though. We can't blame her. She didn't ask for her father to become famous; she just has to live with the consequences. 

A photo posted by Kevin Pillar (@kpillar11) on Dec 29, 2015 at 11:05am PST

 

The Pillar puppies all look to be loved equally, a sturdy support system. 24.2 WAGd. 

Chris Colabello and Marcus Stroman, Clutch Toronto Blue Jays Colabello is not on Toronto’s 25-man postseason roster, but this of Stroman teaching Clutch how to dab from January is too good not to include. Stroman is in the Blue Jays' postseason starting rotation and is a vital part to the team's charisma. It's clear that while Colabello and Clutch aren't in the clubhouse for Toronto's World Series chase right now, they left an impression during the season. 

A video posted by Chris Colabello (@cc20rake) on Jan 29, 2016 at 7:53pm PST

 

Clutch was clearly named with a high expectation to live up to, and he seems to be fulfilling those expectations just fine. Past experiences with Clutch can still impact Toronto's performance moving forward. 14.2 WAGd.

Justin Smoak, golden retriever, Toronto Blue Jays
Justin doesn’t have much of a social media presence, but his lovely wife Kristin Smoak has given us a glimpse into the Smoaks family’s world. Kristin’s Twitter profile features a header photo of the couple’s toddler daughter kissing a golden retriever. Dig a little further and you’ll find this adorable photo of their little girl walking the family dog all by herself on Kristin’s Instagram. The Smoaks’ agility training and love for dogs start at an early age.

 

The dog is walking forward in the photo, so we can’t see its face, but we can only assume that it is loved dearly. Point, Smoak. 13 WAGd. 

Chase Utley, rescued pitbull Jack, Los Angeles Dodgers
The Utley family rescued this beautiful pitbull, and now their son is cuddling with him. Some pictures don’t need captions. This is a sweeter success story than anything that might happen for the Dodgers this postseason. 

Yesterday was national dog fighting awareness day. Thank you @pspca for rescuing this guy.

A photo posted by @therealchaseutley on Apr 9, 2015 at 9:55am PDT

 

In fact, I wish Vin Scully could narrate this photo and every interaction this sweet pit has with his Utley family. That is my retirement assignment for Vin Scully. 14 WAGd. 

Joc Pederson, Blue, Los Angeles Dodgers
A man who kisses his dog — no, a man who is comfortable enough to kiss his dog and show the world is a man who deserves your support. 
Joc’s puppy named Blue also has her own Instagram account, and it is everything. When any of these NLDS games have a lull, you now have somewhere to pass the time. I can’t decide if Blue is Joc’s dog, or a Hallmark card.  Blue is also fan favorite and an honorary Dodger.

A photo posted by Joc Pederson (@yungjoc650) on Oct 2, 2016 at 9:08pm PDT

 

She is also a very young prospect with a lot to prove, but so far, we love her. Instant impact star, just like Joc. 10 WAGd based solely on lack of scouting material. Her WAGd will no doubt only increase with age. Shown in a March tweet by Joc, he just wants to best for his new companion and will do whatever he needs to pull out Blue's potential. 

Yasiel Puig, Duke, Los Angeles Dodgers
Puig is as enthusiastic about his German Shepherd, Duke, as he is about everything. Duke doesn't make regular appearances on Puig's Instagram, which means these two like to keep their relationship private. But in the photos Duke does appear in, his smile is warm and welcoming.

A photo posted by @yasielpuig (@yasielpuig) on Mar 23, 2016 at 10:35am PDT

 

This is probably an unfair WAGd score for Duke, given the lack of scouting material, but his puppy dog eyes work in his favor. 12.3 WAGd. 

Justin Turner, Nug, Los Angeles Dodgers 
Saved the best for last. Turner loves Nug very much. So much does Turner love Nug that Nug Turner has her own Instagram account to flourish on. Nug appears to have two siblings, or at least an inner-circle, and together they are the Dodgers Dogs—not to be confused with the hotdog served at Dodger Stadium.

Nug has a hilarious and rambunctious personality. She even has her own Dodgers jerseyNug goes everywhere with Turner, and if the Dodgers win the World Series, I will petition for Nug to get a ring. There’s really no point in me continuing to type because I’m willing to bet you are now scrolling through Nug’s Instagram page, as you should be. 

A photo posted by Nug Turner (@nugtheminpin) on Jun 19, 2016 at 8:52pm PDT

 

Perfect WAGd score: 40. Nug sticks the landing.  

And so, left only to baseball there is no clear favorite among these four teams to win the World Series. But judging by some of these teams' prime players and their dogs, cats, and animals-of-choice, here are your 2016 World Series favorites, ranked. 

1. Chicago Cubs, total metric score: 82.9
2. Los Angeles Dodgers, total metric score: 76.3
3. Cleveland Indians, total metric score: 72
4.Toronto Blue Jays, total metric score: 64.4

Make of that what you wish.

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