Predicting Marvin Lewis’ 'We’ll move beyond this playoff loss' statement

Welcome to the Yardbarker NFL Roundtable, a place where our most fervent football contributors can kick back, relax and look at the fun (and sometimes not-so-fun) parts of the biggest league in America, the massive behemoth that is the National Football League. Don't forget to check out Part I, Part II, Part III, Part IV, Part V, Part VI, Part VII and Part VIII. 

Over the past decade the Cincinnati Bengals have racked up seven playoff appearances – four of them after finishing first in the AFC North – and have seen seven playoff losses under head coach Marvin Lewis. Lewis, for his part, seems intent on coaching until Cincy has a Super Bowl win. So we had to ask our panelists:  

Predict Marvin Lewis’ “we’ll move beyond this playoff loss” statement for the 2016-2017 season. (Conversely, if you think this is going to be the year they finally break through, his playoff victory speech.)

Sam Greszes: "Building a football team is a process, and it's egregious for our fans to expect us to win more than zero playoff games in the past 16 years. It's a process. A PROCESS. And we have a lot to build on. That's why we aren't going to make any major postseason moves, and instead, resign all our current players and do the exact same thing we did this year next year. Go Bengals."

Joe Boland: "Andy Dalton is a our quarterback. Yes, we believe in Andy Dalton. Sure, he threw 5 interceptions and led AJ Green into a concussion, but Andy Dalton can lead us to a Super Bowl (next year)."

Mike Tunison: I think the Bengals will finally break through and win one, at which point Marvin Lewis will rip atrophied muscles in his face cracking a smile. Marvin Lewis is Jim Caldwell plus five percent personality.

Demetrius Bell: He'll probably just shed one tear from a deep and profound place of sadness, give some general answers to the softball questions that he'll receive, then proceed to quietly clear his office – only to receive yet another contract extension from Mike Brown, so he can go through the same thing next year.

Vincent Frank: "Hey, at least we're not the Cleveland Browns."

Shiloh Carder: I personally think this is Lewis' final season as the head coach of the Bengals no matter what. I think, somehow, that the Bengals finally break their curse and win a playoff game (probably at the AFC South champs' spot) and Lewis rides off into the sunset and into the front office. It's been an assumption that Lewis will take over control of the operations side of the team since he's been a very good talent evaluator in Cincy. Ownership would never fire him so it would be up to Lewis to decide when he's done coaching. It could be after the Bengals finally win that elusive playoff game.  

Daniel Tran: "Screw it. I never wanted to get rid of Carson Palmer. 'Pacman' is one of weirdest nicknames I've ever heard. I can't handle Vontaze Burfict. Me, Marvin 'I can save him' Lewis can't salvage Burfict. Pennsylvania is better than Ohio. Lewis out." - Marvin Lewis, after his last playoff loss as a Cincinnati Bengal in 2016.

Phillip Barnett: After the Bengals finally win a playoff game, a 10-7 wildcard game overtime victory over the Jaguars, Marvin Lewis will tell the media how he felt the spirit of Harambe as the ball left Mike Nugent's foot and floated through the crisp Cincinnati air for, as he will tell it, "what felt like an eternity" before grazing the left upright and falling through for the three-point win.

Jamie Neal: Marvin Lewis needs to be fired if he cant get his group over the hump this year. I don’t blame him for his quarterback being mediocre and keeping the Bengals in QB purgatory (h/t @NFLosophy) and I don’t blame Lewis for Burfict and his temper or Jeremy Hill/Giovani Bernard and their inability to produce at a consistent level, but when does being mediocre in any other aspect of life allow someone to keep their position for 13 years? And a position where there are only 32 available IN THE WORLD??

Seven winning seasons in 13 years is decent, but some of those other seasons were rough. A .543 winning percentage and zero playoff wins in seven postseasons? Lewis has found a way to emulate Jeff Fisher and keep his job despite being as close to average as possible.

So his postseason speech will probably be something like, "We didn't go out there and execute like we had all season. We came into this game at 11-5 with the number three seed and we played like a JV football team." Blah blah blah blah blah. What he should be saying is, "I'd really like to find my way onto another coaching staff where I can learn some things and make some adjustments to my skill set. This probably isn’t the right position for me right now and my game could use some help." 

David Matthews: You know, only one team can win each year. I think Marvin Lewis is too good of a coach to not win it all at least once (just look at how long it took Bill Cowher or Tony Dungy, their terrible personalities aside, to break through). The AFC is going to be a complete toss-up this year, so maybe now is Cincinnati's time to shine. Marvin's statement this year? "To entropy!"